


R&R

by cruisedirector, CyberMum



Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: F/M, Poetry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2002-02-02
Updated: 2002-02-02
Packaged: 2017-10-06 23:33:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 716
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/58932
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cruisedirector/pseuds/cruisedirector, https://archiveofourown.org/users/CyberMum/pseuds/CyberMum
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Holographic recreation can be a dangerous thing.</p>
            </blockquote>





	R&R

One day when he'd had enough tech,  
Tom Paris went to the holodeck  
To blow off some steam  
In a Captain Proton dream  
But his own captain his plans did wreck.

She'd taken some time of her own  
And forgotten to make the fact known  
That she had been inclined  
To relax and unwind  
Sitting on Chaotica's throne.

When he saw her dressed all in lame  
And took note of her decollete  
He opened a channel  
On the control panel  
And hailed her XO Chakotay.

Then he walked straight into the program,  
And greeted Janeway: "Good evening, Ma'am."  
But she turned with a grin  
And grabbed him by the chin--  
She thought Tom was Proton's hologram!

And though he knew that he should reveal  
He was her pilot--and he was real--  
When she asked for a kiss  
A chance he wouldn't miss  
He obliged her romantic appeal.

Now Tom osculated with flair  
But when Janeway came up for some air  
And saw what she'd missed--  
It was Tom whom she'd kissed--  
She said to him, "How could you dare!

Perhaps you've a spatial disorder..."  
As she scanned him with a tricorder  
He was quick to reply  
As she gave him the 'eye'  
"I won't disobey an order."

Just then Chakotay rushed in  
And he took in the scene with chagrin  
He'd caught Captain Perfecto  
In flagrante delecto  
Though she'd not yet committed a sin.

Before she could even explain,  
In a rage which he refused to rein  
Chak had launched himself at  
His rival, knocked him flat,  
Leaving Tom floored and groaning with pain.

Then Chak turned on Kathryn. "All these years  
This has been one of my greatest fears:  
That this slimeball Tom Paris  
Might let his captain harass  
Him." And he burst into tears.

The captain was totally floored.  
"You're going a bit overboard,  
I made a mistake  
So give me a break.  
Your behavior is rather untoward."

"I'm sorry my darling," he sobbed,  
"I feel as though I have been robbed  
Of your total devotion."  
"What a ludicrous notion!"  
But still his aching heart throbbed.

In the meantime Tom Paris came to  
And said "Chak-man, you do misconstrue:  
What you saw was an error,  
You need have no terror,  
I'd never come in between you."

But Chakotay would not be placated  
And his tears continued unabated.  
Watching him get congested,  
The pilot suggested,  
"Perhaps he just needs to be sated."

Kathryn dropped her jaw in mock-disgust,  
But thought that she might have to trust  
Tom's hypothesis  
For his instincts on this  
Were sound...and she was feeling some lust.

"Chakotay," she purred, "You poor schmuck,  
I know you're feeling down on your luck,  
And I think Tom is right  
That what you need tonight  
Is to relax and have a good..."

Chak interrupted with a sigh  
As a last tear escaped from his eye.  
"Oh Kathryn," he smiled,  
"You're driving me wild  
But I think that I can comply."

With that he took Kathryn's hand;  
The Commander was back in command.  
He leaned in for a kiss  
The result was sheer bliss  
It was like being in Wonderland.

And when Kathryn gave a small moan  
Chakotay's response was a groan  
They scurried post-haste  
(The fact is they raced)  
Right up to Chaotica's throne.

And as they proceeded to sit,  
Paris quickly called for the exit.  
He did not want to watch  
His seniors carve a notch  
Right there in the program he'd writ.

Yet he had a thought diabolic  
As behind him the couple did frolic.  
So his parting slam  
Was to change the program  
Into a setting bucolic.

The Captain and her would-be lover  
Found themselves out of doors with no cover  
In the middle of winter  
And Chak got a splinter  
From the now-rustic bench they draped over.

"Chakotay, this really won't do,"  
She cried as she sneezed, "Oh--Achoo!"  
He quickly agreed,  
A command code he keyed  
And called up an alternate venue.

Kathryn looked round with a smile  
"Chakotay, you really have style,  
But please I implore  
That you lock the door--  
I want to keep a low profile."

Of course he did as she asked  
And he had his Kathryn at last.  
They made their 'pleasure trip'  
On the bridge of her ship  
His fantasies finally surpassed.


End file.
